Eloping looks different for every couple and you picked to elope for a reason and I understand family dynamics may play a role to making that choice. You don’t have to tell family of your elopement at all if that isn’t the relationship you have with your family! To quote Harry Styles
You can let it go You can throw a party full of everyone you know And not invite your family, ’cause they never showed you love You don’t have to be sorry for leaving and growing up
You can see the world, following the seasons Anywhere you go, you don’t need a reason ‘Cause they never showed you love You don’t have to be sorry for doing it on your own
Matilda Harry Styles
At the end of the day you won’t be able to make everyone happy, likely some random aunt will be offended and I always want you to feel comfy and happy but sometimes that means ruffling a few feathers and having the wedding day of your dreams and not your family members. So here is full permission to tell your family and turn off the phone if you need to.
Let them know before hand
Write them a letter
Being able to expain your thoughts in a coherent way and lay out why you chose to elope. Reiterate why eloping is best for you and that they need to trust that you are grown adult making the decisions that prioritize your happiness and not some else’s comfort. OF course say it however you feel comfortable but without the fear of an automatic response!
Zoom call
Maybe some back and forth is necessary, allows them to ask questions and give explanations to how you feel. Talking it out can also give you opportunity to tell them how they can support you during planning and the actual elopement. Use it as an opportunity to invite them to celebrate with you in a specific way!
In Person
Every family dynamic is different so this may not be an option for everyone but in person can be a super loving way of allerting the people who need to know.
Tell them after as a Surprise
Send a letter or card with a photo from the elopement
When you get your sneak peeks pick out your favorite make a cute card online and send it to friends and Family as an announcement to show off your adventure elopement. You could do this even if you told family beforehand!
Video call with you celebrating after the ceremony
Whether day of or the next day back at your hotel and Airbnb you can surprise family with a lovely call! Keep it short any sweet heck even call them at a bad time to leave a message! My introvert side definitely believes you can create a few waves and then turn your phone off for the rest of your honeymoon if that’s what you need to do!
Post it on Social!
Surprise everyone! Your day doesn’t need to be shared every step of the way if you don’t want to but a quick photo for the gram is a perfect way to announce to everyone who needs to know and maybe a few people who don’t!
Send them a letter later!
Let them know without having to deal with a response right away, you can write it when you feel ready and convey all the things you want to say with no extra pressure to assert yourself in person.
Make them a photo album
One photo card not enough show them the whole day with an album. We can work together to create an album that shows a little bit or certain parts of your day where they can feel like they were there even if they definitely were not apart!
Throw a party!
Use a photo on the card as the invite and celebrate your elopement with a party with all your closets friends, they get told it already happened and you can rub away the sting with a party and a promise of some food! Even if its food they bring!
Surprise them DAY OF
Surprise Zoom call of the Ceremony
Day of options are hard but definitely a surprise! This option would be great if you have a small group of potential viewers and can schedule a call beforehand to tell them of your nuptials!
Video call day of
Service isn’t always available but a phone or video call can be a fun way to tell your family you tied the knot. Keep it short and sweet and celebrate over the phone!
Text message
A simple photo and text message is a perfect way to alert the key figures in your life if need be.
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